In my heart and in my head

Ok finally a post without a picture of a gourd. Honestly, I was getting sick of posting them and I know that all of you who read this (both of you are really nice for humoring me by the way) were probably sick of reading about them. I have just 4 more to deliver and then I promise the word gourd will not grace your screen on my account for quite a while.

So today I've been feeling very crafty. Not in the sense that I'm scheming, but in the sense that I want to make something....and I don't want to study. I know that's a horrible thing to say, but it's an honest thing to say. I am all quizzed and tested out this week and unfortunately, I still have two more quizzes to prepare for. It will happen. I will study, but I don't want to. That's the point I'm trying to make. So earlier I was cruising around the web looking for a project to get started on. I found this cake and these brownies and these cookies...and then I realized that I had procrastinated enough and it was time to get back to the grindstone....

Tonight I went to dinner with some friends and then went to the informational meeting for a medical mission trip I'm going on this summer. We're going to stay on the Amazon river and minister the people of Peru. I am very excited because I've never been on a mission trip before and I know that it will be a great opportunity to help people and see things I would not be able to see in the dental clinic at MCG, but I will admit that there is an element of fear for me. Will I be able to raise the money to go? Once I go will I be able to do any good with the little knowledge I have? Will I get sick on a boat on the Amazon river, so far away from the people I love and the capitalist healthcare system I hold so dear? When I read back on those questions, they seem kind of trivial but there is a very real part of me that is a little nervous about going. I'm just being transparent.

So here I am and here is my heart. My crafty, difficultly motivated, worried heart.

I wish I was here instead.